Halloween Joke – Going To A Party

A cab driver picks up a nun. She gets into the cab and the cab driver won’t stop staring at her. She asks him why he is staring and he replies, “I have a question to ask you but I don’t want to offend you.”

She answers, “My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you’re as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear just about everything. I’m sure that there’s nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive.”

“Well, I’ve always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me.”

She responds, “Well, let’s see what we can do about that: #1, you have to be single and #2, you must be a Catholic.”

The cab driver is very excited and says, “Yes, I am single and I’m Catholic too!”

The nun says, “OK, pull into the next alley.”

He does and the nun fulfills his fantasy. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.

“My dear child,” said the nun, “Why are you crying?”

“Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, I’m married and I’m a Baptist.”

The nun says, “That’s OK, I am on the way to a Halloween party, and my name is Kevin.

Flush DBS High Notes 5 Down The Drain

After a prolonged wait for embattled investors who bought into Lehman linked products, their worst fears have been confirmed. While mediation for Hong Kong Lehman minibond investors is currently underway, for those who purchased DBS High Notes 5, they might as well flush them down the drain.

Read the full article here.

Crazy UCA Shooting

Sirens sounded at the University of Central Arkansas campus on Sunday. The campus is officially on lock-down as three persons are gunned down. UCA Police says the shooting happened around 9:50 p.m. near the Snow Fine Arts Center.

One person died on the scene and the second died at Conway Regional Medical Center according to a hospital spokesperson. The third person injured in the shooting has been treated and released from the hospital.

Warwick Sabin, UCA vice president of communications, says police are looking for four suspects in the case, one of which has been apprehended.

Classes are canceled for Monday and all housing facilities are restricted to residents only.

Sarah Palin On SNL

Sarah Palin is all the rage these days. She cannot help but get into the headlines, unfortunately for all the wrong reasons. Voters are not happy with the cost ($150,000) for her wardrobe makeover.

Wearing expensive and fashionable costumes while the rest of Americans are scrimping their income is politically insensitive.  It certainly doesn’t tie in with her image of a hockey mom in a small town with all the right American values.

To add to her woes, the costume designer for “Saturday Night Live” revealed the struggle he had in dressing Sarah Palin: she wanted to wear nicer clothes than they had picked out for her, reflecting the new image she has carefully constructed on the campaign trail.

While Palin’s transformation from hockey mom to fashion plate has raised eyebrows, her “SNL” character, played by Tina Fey, has remained firmly in the red jacket. And according to Women’s Wear Daily’s Irin Carmon, “SNL” costume designer Tom Broecker said Wednesday night that dressing Palin for last Saturday’s cameo required a compromise:

Broecker said, “In speaking with her, I had to get her to understand why she needed to wear the same thing as Tina [Fey]. We had gone off and created it for the first time a month ago, a look we identified as Sarah Palin. She had moved on in her own image of herself. I said, ‘I know you’ve moved on ­ you’re wearing tighter clothes, more black ­ but this is the character of Sarah Palin.”

The compromise, he said, was Palin returning in her own clothes the second time she appeared on the show to cheer on Amy Poehler’s Palin-themed rap.

Poor Sarah Palin. She can’t accurately state what the VP does, but she is so obsessed about her SNL costume. See this interesting write-up of Sarah Palin’s psychological setup and her video.

Come Nov 5, if Palin is not elected as Vice President, I feel she can always go back to Alaska as mayor… though they will have to allocate a larger budget now that she has acquired a taste for finer things.

Even if she quits politics, she has a future doing talk shows due to her appeal. As an eye candy on TV, nobody will notice her lack of substance. By the way, her appearance on SNL grossed the highest SNL ratings in the past 14 years!

Global Stock Markets Pricing In Recession

Stock markets are now entering a period of painful decline as countries around the world face up to the prospect of recession. While interbank lending has eased tentatively as central banks’ measures to inject cash loans to banks unblocked the credit crunch, investors have little time to absorb the good news.

Read the full article here.

Diana Bianchi Sex Tape

Rumors of an explicit home video showing Christie Brinkley’s slimy hubby Peter Cook having sex with his curvy teen office worker Diana Bianchi have made the rounds for months.

A sex tape has been revealed showing Cook and Bianchi, both nude, having sexual intercourse on a brown love seat. They also show Bianchi performing a sizzling striptease down to a pair of black, G-string panties and then to her birthday suit as Cook holds his crotch.

Another scene shows Cook resting his head on Bianchi’s buttocks. It appears the tape was made at Cook’s Southampton architectural office without Bianchi’s knowledge. But other stills that are apparently not from the video show Bianchi willingly posing topless.

Diana Bianchi, the other woman in the Christie Brinkley divorce scandal, is speaking out against the reports that there is an alleged sex tape of her and Brinkley’s ex husband Peter Cook. In an exclusive statement from her attorney, Diana Bianchi says she was “unaware that he was videotaping their sexual encounters.”

Peter and Christie’s divorce became final in July, amid accusations that he spent thousands of dollars a month on internet pornography and had an affair with a then 18-year-old Bianchi.

Prudence Is The Way To Go

Let us look at the below comic strip:

Don’t you just love CEOs who talk about issuing options to align their interests with shareholders? They conveniently omitted that that they are aligned on the upside but without money committed like shareholders, they have virtually no risk and little downside.

Read the full article here.

GM Chrysler Merger Talks Unveiled

It is no secret that General Motors is barely surviving in this economic upheaval. GM share price continue its freefall, reaching an unprecedented trough in over 50 years.

There are bankruptcy fears and the automotive giant looked vulnerable even after insisting that they are not seeking bankruptcy protection.

Fellow car giant, Chrysler, is not having a good time either. In fact, Chrysler could be in worse shape financially. According to the Wall Street Journal, there are merger and acquisition talks involving GM and Chrysler.

Chrysler is owned by Cerberus Capital Management, which controls 80.1% of the company. It also owns 51% of the automotive lending company GMAC, while GM owns the other 49%. Cerberus was reported to have proposed to trade its stake in Chrysler to GM, while Cerebus would receive GM’s stake in GMAC in return.

GM and Chrysler are two of the notorious “Big Three” in the automotive industry. But this industry, like many others in recent months and years, has had its value decrease due to the economic turmoil in the United States. The 100-year-old GM and the 83-year-old Chrysler would shake up the entire industry even more with a merger, though in less than ideal circumstances.

Cerberus is only a year removed from purchasing a controlling interest in Chrysler, and two years removed from buying 51% of GMAC. Yet the private-equity firm is already looking to sell both.

According to sources that talked to the Wall Street Journal, the merger negotiations between GM and Chrysler began over a month ago, before the most recent crashes in the stock market. However, these economic troubles and the falling prices of both GM and Chrysler stock have put talks of a merger on hold. As soon as markets stabilize, however, the merger talks between GM, Chrysler and Cerberus may resume.

GM and Chrysler were close to a possible merger last year until Cerberus bought out most of Chrysler. GM was also in brief talks to merge with Ford in 2005.

Chrysler sales went down 33% in September, while GM sales went down by 16%. Sales of automobiles as a whole in the United States are down 13% this year.

Are You Rattled By The Stock Market Crash?

The credit crunch is now the most critical challenge facing the US administrators and central banks around the world. Without loans to lubricate the system, perfectly sound businesses may not be able to meet short-term obligations, and consumers’ reluctance to purchase goods/services will force the economy into seizure with more shutdowns and rising unemployment.

Read the full article here.

Worst Stock Market Crash Since 1937

This is not the time to write lengthy posts after the carnage we have witnessed in global stock markets. I believe nobody is in the mood to read market analysis. A picture speaks a thousand words.

Read the full article here.